When an organization is divided, the temptation is to push for a quick agreement, to get everyone to “move on” and get back to business, but forced alignment doesn’t hold. Regardless of whether I’ve been working with a team, a board, or in an international context with the United Nations or the Red Cross, the … Read more

At Turning Point Resolutions (TPR), we want organizations to be educated, supported, and well-trained to manage conflict in-house to the greatest extent, when and where it makes sense. Many workplace conflicts can be addressed effectively through early, thoughtful, and well-structured in-house conversations. When conflict is identified early, and the people involved are willing to participate, … Read more

Sometimes a conflict resists every reasonable intervention. You’ve had the conversations, tried to mediate, made structural changes, adjusted roles and responsibilities, but the tension keeps resurfacing. When that happens, it’s usually a sign that the thing you’re treating isn’t the thing that’s actually driving the conflict. A workplace assessment exists to find what is. In … Read more

When an allegation of bullying or harassment lands on a leader’s desk, the instinct is often to fear the allegation, take it personally, talk the complainant out of it, or turn it over to People and Culture/Human Resources and wash your hands of it. These are the same things that cause an investigation to go … Read more

Most workplace conflicts don’t start as crises. They start as a missed comment, an unequal workload, a decision someone felt shut out of, and they harden quietly until two capable people can no longer work together. By the time a manager calls us, the question is rarely “who’s right?” It’s “how do we move forward … Read more

Most people don’t avoid difficult conversations because they don’t know what to say. They avoid them because they’re afraid of how the other person will react or worried that they themselves will escalate the conversation, and so the issue festers until it’s harder to raise, not easier. In our coaching work across BC workplaces, the … Read more

When a team is stuck, the instinct is to put everyone in a room and “talk it out.” Without structure, those meetings often make things worse: the loudest voices dominate, the real issues stay unspoken, emotions escalate, and people leave more entrenched than when they arrived. Skilled facilitation turns a roomful of disagreement into a … Read more

Examine your self-talk to be sure it is serving you well. We all have an inner voice that comments on what we are doing, for better or for worse. Psychologists refer to this inner dialogue as self-talk. You are always going to engage in self-talk, but it doesn’t have to be negative. You can learn … Read more

We can all relate to feeling put upon and irritated by some people, but powerless to stop accommodating them. Though we take issue with their behavior, needs, or implicit demands, it’s not so easy to set limits. We may be uncomfortable with conflict and not want anyone to be mad or disappointed. We may feel … Read more

Defensiveness refers to both a feeling and a behavior. The feeling is typically elicited when you feel as though someone is being critical of you, and results in shame, sadness, and anger. In turn, behavior usually results from the feeling, such as being sarcastic, giving someone the silent treatment, or being critical in return. Purpose … Read more